If travel has thought me something, it is that things are not going to happen as we want. Do you allow travel to take away the power to control?
I have mentioned before how nervous I get every time I have to fly on a plane. Actually, I don’t feel that bad because I have noticed how this is a common malady among travelers and members of the blogging community.
There is no mystery about this. I admit I am a chicken for certain things and I just go with the flow. I just bite fear on the head and get into the plane. It may be the most torturous time of a trip but everything is forgotten once I arrive at my destination.
The other day I found an interesting alternative view of the flying “problem”. A friend of mine does not fly, not because he is scared of planes or heights, it is because he doesn’t want to get into a situation he cannot control. And, this is something I have never heard of before.
In some way, he is right. I have always thought about flying as one of the biggest acts of faith out there. When you get into the plane, you have to trust the pilots, the staff, the air controllers, the guys in charge of maintenance, and the other 500 folks flying with you (assuming you are on one of those jumbo jets).
Oh, and I forgot to mention, you have to believe the actual mechanical bird is in optimal condition. So there you have it. Hardcore travelers need to have trust in tons of strangers. Because there are professionals in charge of making sure we make it to the other end but in reality, a safe flight depends on all of us contributing a grain of salt. Mind-blowing, if you carefully think about it!!
But no, I am not here to scare you with my crazy thoughts. The point is that it is almost impossible to have control in a situation like that. As a matter of fact, a lot of the aspects related to travel are beyond our obsessive controlling impulses.
If travel has thought me something, it is that things are not going to happen as we want (no matter how much we plan them). The weather may not cooperate. The hotel room may not look like the photo posted on the booking site. You get lost. A tour company can cancel an excursion. Things are more expensive than expected. And so and so and so. This is just a small sample of all the things that can go wrong.
This is why travel and control do not go together. If you want to always have total control over daily situations a) you are going to exclude travel and new adventures from your life or b) you are not fully enjoying the exposure to new experiences or c) you are complaining about why this or that happened.
I have a humble recommendation if you believe you are a control freak. Life is not going to shatter into pieces if you let go a little bit. Go with the flow and believe everything is going to be alright. Start by loosening the reins little by little. Try to be more expontaneous. Enjoy the moment.
But please, do me a favor. Don’t deny yourself worthwhile experiences because you know things are not going to be as you want. Don’t subject your loved ones to your control-oriented decisions.
Because there is nothing more delicious than going on a trip and being excited about how everything is going to turn out. And this is something with implications in all aspects of life if you look at it from the correct angle.
We talk a lot about how fear stops us from doing what we want. However, the desire to control is another of those obnoxious behaviors that keep popping in the middle of the road.
How do you deal with the necessity of having control? Do you think control is fear seen from another perspective? Let me know in the comments section below. Would love to hear your thoughts on this one.